The fear has been set aside. I have been to the ocean. Now without the glasses on my face, my vision seems impaired. But once your head is under the water, the water then seems impaired! What the ... was that smoggy, milky salt water? This was my first impression, so those of you who think ocean water it is wonderful, good for you. I am a land character. Im sure the water isnt the same everywhere, but here I wasnt impressed.
I went out with the Hammerheads Tri group and they started out running into the water. I walked in feeling my way to this new venture. The temperature was nice (I told myself). I walked until I couldnt walk anymore and begin to float watching everyone the best I can to follow the flow. Once the direction was set I begin to swim. A fear came over me that I was alone. Everyone seemed so far away when I finally took a peek. I really am slooowwww in the water. (Not that Im fast on land, but pretty steady, and I like it there...but anyway.) I begin to panic and decided to swim back to shore. Why? "... cause who the ... cares if lose my breath out here in this nasty ass water!"
Then I here my name being called, from where I dont know. When I heard them say"you can do it" That was all it took. "Someone believes in me" I thought. The kayak besides me had also put proof in the pudding. I start to swim back out. The comfort made me secure, I begin to relax as if I to be where I was, I felt welcomed. "How are you Pamela" I hear a voice say. "I feel labored, but fine." I respond"get on your back," she said. I thought 'oh yeah' and I flipped over and begin to talk to my Dad in the imagined heavens above. I was complete, comfortable and without fear.
The bike was good...except I lost my way. I went with some other group. This was my first time to the beach since I've been living here going on 7 years. Shame on me. The was run was laboring as well, my legs felt like I needed a good message. I have less than 3 weeks til the triathlon. First, I was feeling like backing out til my daughter said "You can do anything Mommy." then I had to if only for her. It will good to have her there during the event, cause I know she believes in me even when I don't. My Motivation. Then, I started feeling comfortable with it. Now Im excited about it. But I love running more then anything and I think the training has taken some of my legs, but I will see when this over.
What motivates you?
2 comments:
and I believe you can as well, good luck out there you will do just fine these two wonderful people you draw your strength from and your determination will get you throgh.
you conquered the fear! if you had given up and swam to shore, you would have never known if you can do it, now you know
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